Student Finds Fraternity's Playboy Party Disturbing
Lucy Shiffman
When I first heard about a Playboy-themed party hosted annually by a fraternity, I was a little shocked. Doesn't anyone think that this seems backwards and anti-feminist? It called for the guys to dress like pimps and the girls to dress as scantily as possible, short of arriving naked. Upon arriving, I immediately needed to take off my coat as I was inundated by the humidity from the body heat of the partygoers. There were drunken, shirtless male attendees wearing bow ties or wearing bathrobes and chewing on cigars. Not surprising. What was surprising, however, were the flocks of girls; my jaw dropped. There were people wearing outfits that consisted of only a bra, underwear, and perhaps a garter belt. Seriously?
My attitude toward fraternities at Trinity has always been a little derisive and disdainful. They, in essence, are establishments that create an artificial environment in which harmful, reckless, and downright sinful behavior is normalized. I would never, in any other environment, feel that it is appropriate to elbow through a crowd, spilling beer everywhere, only to engage in dancing that so closely resembles sex that it is absurd and then make-out with someone on the dance floor in front of everyone, feeling no embarrassment.
However, maybe this Playboy-themed party is actually a good thing. People really put it out there. It is about sex. It is all about sex. Does this bother you? Here, chug this beer, it dulls the sensation of disgust.
I'm not sure why this particular party bothered me more than others like GI Joes and Barbie hos, CEOs and Secretary Hos - notice a pattern? I know, it's really easy to rhyme things with "ho," but it's insulting. Yet, the supposedly bright young girls that attend Trinity continue to buy into these parties, perpetuating them. It has gotten so out of control; I recall one night when my roommate and I were dancing in the basement of a certain frat, and a brother approached us and yelled, "Why are you girls dancing so far apart? Get closer!" In an attempt to be sarcastic, I enthusiastically replied, "Wooo! I love being misogynized!" to which he replied, "Yeah! That's what I'm talking about!" I'm sorry, but what did I do to be so unapologetically objectified?
Perhaps we are asking for it. Can we blame these boys for treating us as if the Feminist Movement never took place when we so willingly don bras, panties, and bunny ears and head out into the night to purposely get drunk and make some bad decisions? I don't know, but I personally refuse to encourage this absurdity. But, hey, I still go to fraternities and occasionally make some bad decisions, so maybe I'm not really one to talk. However, I always make it out wearing at least a shirt.
Viewing Comments 1 - 10 of 40
Trinity Alumnus
posted 4/08/08 @ 5:13 PM EST
Ms. Shiffman,
The Girls Next Door is on at all times of the day on basic cable's E! channel. Maybe you should tell MTV and E! to stop creating... "an artificial environment in which harmful, reckless, and downright sinful behavior is normalized. (Continued…)
JW
posted 4/08/08 @ 5:33 PM EST
Simple answer: don't go to the frats.
Harry Cohen
posted 4/08/08 @ 5:33 PM EST
Your last paragraph says it all. What makes you keep going back to fraternity parties and this one in particular if refuse to encourage it? Reguardless of where the party is or what the attire of the night is, many college boys and girls are going to behave like this. (Continued…)
Lucy Schiffman
posted 4/08/08 @ 6:10 PM EST
..And in continuation to respond to everyone:
I think girls next door and rock of love are gross and embarassing displays of American culture gone wrong. (Continued…)
I did stop going to frats
posted 4/08/08 @ 6:34 PM EST
I quit goingt to frats after some stranger at Psi u felt the need to grab both of my breasts and leave his hands there for 2 or 3 seconds. I responded " I know this is Psi U but dont [expletive gerund] touch me"
that doesnt change the fact that I am forever bothered that someone would think that was okay. (Continued…)
kathryn
posted 4/08/08 @ 6:44 PM EST
most men need to evaluate their relationships with the female sex
and they need to make sure to recognize females as people first, and not just as sex objects
and women need to have a personality and tell men who objectify them to stop it. (Continued…)
Psi U Brother Responds...
posted 4/08/08 @ 8:56 PM EST
As a Psi U brother it saddens me to hear than any of you have had a bad experience at my Fraternity. I would like to speak to a few of the above mentioned comments. (Continued…)
i find it hard to believe
posted 4/08/08 @ 9:37 PM EST
that " there was nothing at the party that degraded women in any way shape or form"
you obviously can't control what is said by people but and the sexism that exists in society as a whole but every brother as psi u should make it a point to educate themselves about how women feel about these type of parties and psi u brothers (and gentlemen at all the fraternities) can make it known that certain behavior and/or comments will not be tolerated. (Continued…)
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posted 4/08/08 @ 10:36 PM EST
no I actually meant that he should educate himself about how women who attend the parties feel about how they are treated at psi u on the weekends. Have they had bad experiences? the brothers should know. (Continued…)
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posted 4/08/08 @ 10:47 PM EST
p.s. I'm not offended by a playboy party
I'm offended by a dude grabbing a stranger's ass or making some sexual comment to a stranger
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