The Tripod

All football commentary aside (especially since I'm a Pats fan), we all know the real reason to watch the Super Bowl: the commercials. This year, the commercial competitors were almost as funny as watching big brother Peyton giving Eli quarterback advice from the booth and almost as bad as Paula Abdul's pre-recorded lip-syncing fiasco in the pre-game show. For those of you sans televisions or living under a large rock somewhere, here's a rundown of the ten funniest commercials this year.

10. Pepsi: The ad featured Justin Timberlake being dragged along to the tune of a woman sucking Pepsi from a straw. The guffaw moment came when the pop star's junk (not in a box) repeatedly hit a mailbox. Amusing, but weak.

9. FedEx: Using pigeons instead of FedEx? Brilliant. Using giant pigeons that wreak havoc across the city instead of delivering packages? More brilliant. Watching with a sister who has a deadly fear of pigeons? Best. Night. Ever.

8. Bridgestone: A wayward squirrel finds himself in death's path as he stops to grab a nut in the middle of the street. Chaos ensues, as all of Nature begins to scream in panic, and order is only restored when the car swerves - safely, of course. One notable star-sighting - the ad featured the woman from the "Lint-licker" Orbit commercials.

7. Vitamin Water: Shaquille O'Neal plays a jockey riding a horse named "Chunk of Love." The oversized basketball star manages to win with a photo finish, obviously thanks to Vitamin Water. Not funny in itself, but amusing if only to see a massive O'Neal attempting to ride a horse and towering over the other miniscule jockeys.

6. Budweiser: This classic ad featured a Clydesdale horse that couldn't make the team being trained by a Dalmatian, only to make the team again the next year. It was kitschy and cute but gets major bonus points for the Rocky soundtrack in the background.

5. Bud Light: Will Ferrell wearing short-shorts has been done before (and will undoubtedly be done again and again), but it still manages to retain its humor. Dressed as basketball player Jackie Moon (for his latest flick Semi-Pro), Ferrell keeps flubbing his promo lines, eventually just blurting, "Bud Light. Suck It."

4. Coca-Cola: A faux political debate show has Democrat James Carville and Republican Bill Frist spending a day together in D.C., overlooking their political enmity and unified by a mutual love of Coca-Cola. Highbrow comedy, but for the politically savvy among you, still funny.

3. Planters: A ridiculously unattractive woman strolls down a city street, somehow attracting attention from every man she passes. Her secret? She uses the scent of a Planters Cashew instead of perfume.

2. Bud Light: Comedian Carlos Mencia tries to give romantic advice - speak with a foreign accent and you will win the ladies. Mispronunciation and social awkwardness follow, but the best lines hands-down were "You make sandwich … I am meat" and "Bood Light" instead of Bud Light.

1. Doritos: I really was not expecting a funny result from a commercial that began with a man using a Dorito chip to bait a mousetrap. However, when a giant man in a mouse costume burst out of the wall and began to beat him silly, I broke into hysterical laughter. The commercial made absolutely no sense, but, as my dear old father said, was "still funny as hell."

Go to www.myspace.com/superbowlads to watch each commercial.

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